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Tri-County News
Kimball, Minnesota
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August 27, 2009     Tri-County News
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August 27, 2009
 

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d. D'- "---- t t Thursday, August 27, 2009 ounty News Kimb !, MN Jill Pert|er "Slices of Life" When green paint becomes more than green paint It was lUSt green paint. Splat- tered. In our bathroom sink. I didn't give it more than a sec- ond thought. In my house, green paint in the bathroom sink is hardly cause for alarm. Besides, I knew they had access to spray paint. I bought it for them. They were painting their bikes ter question anyway. The answer wasn't what I expected - in part because they misunderstood my question, and in part because their reply was shocking. The toys were right here, in the bathroom, they answered as ff I should have known that already. Note FredricRson What would Roger do? We all know a Roger. Roger is mentioned to someone within Hog- the guy who has done it all, seen er's earshot that I had just pur- it all and been it all. The Roger you~ chased a new laptop computer. know has claimedt0 have adven- Not to be Outdone Roger immedi- tures, which make the ones James ately announced to the entire table Bond and Indiana Jones experience that he had gotten his new laptop appear quite boring. The Roger I from Microsoft's Bill Gates himself know is a friend of a friend of mine and that the software oh it was so and this Roger may possibly be the advanced it would not be released in an attempt to rejuvenate and We spray-painted them there, they king of all Rogers! for anotherthreeyears. make them last through the rest said, pointing at the newly-green On occasion, Roger and I attend When asked why Bill Gates of the waning summer. I didn't polka-dot sink. the same social functions, and each would give Roger a computer, his want to spring for new bikes so I I set down the scrubbing pad time we seem to end up visiting in response was that many years relented with the spray paint It so I could put 100 percent of my the same group of people. And if ago, when Gates was struggling to was another weak moment on the energy into the mad-mom glare I anyone happens to mention any- develop his company, Roger had mommy-meter. But that's another was working up. thing other than mundane morsels convinced Gates that his choice article. The bathroom! I said the two of polite conversation, Roger can-: of Microsquishy Would not be a Back to the green paint in the words with as much exclamation not resist"one upping" the person'g very marketable name and recom- POSTNL~STER: Send address changes to the Tri-County News, NO. Box 220, Kimball MN 55353. The Tri-County News (USPS 639- 180) is entered at the Post Office, KimbaU, Minnesota 55353, as Periodi- cals. It is published Thursdays by the Tri-County News, Inc., NO. Box 220, Kimball MN 55353, Stearns County. LOCATION: Our office is at 70 Main Street South in downtown Kimball. Weekday office hours are Monday 9 a.m.-5 p.m. and Tuesday through Friday 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Our telephone and fax number is (320) 398-5000. E-mail can be addressed to . Our Web site is . We also have a drop site at Ertl Hard- ware Hank in downtown Watkins. DEADLINE: 2 pim. Monday. RATES: ,Subscrlption :rates are $30/year ($20 for age 62 and old= er)- in Minnesota;, S40/year, (S30 for'seniors) eisewherein the U.S. Single copy price is 75 cents. STAFF: Jean DOran Matua, Editor and Publisher Sue Hughes: Creative Designer Maxine Doran: Admin. Asst. and Personality Photography; 2007 RINA Award for Advertising Excellence; 2007 MNA Award, Best Information Graphic; 2000 MNAAward, Classified Adyer- tising; 2004 MNA Award, Advertis- ing Excellence; 2000 MNA Award, Best Local News Story. 2009, www.tricountynews.MN bathroom. Not a federal offense, as I could muster. The bathroom! ] story with a more spectacular one, mended he change it to Microsoft yet cause for a customary series said it again, to hammer my point For instance, after a dinner party,' ... and that he also might want to of questions. You kno.w, lthe usual: home. " several" Of the m~n~ folk decided ;~oo considei~ adding a thesaurus option Who, WhaL Where, When and You were spray painting. In this retreat to the p~tio' for cigars an~,.to ~its- squishywear package. Roger Why. , bathroom? Rogerjoinedus.Aswepuffed0nour revealed that ~3ates ~vas so grateful' To be honest, I figured someone The boys did their best to look stogies, one of the guys mentioned for his advice that every:0nee ina got green paint on his hands and sheepish and forlorn, how he had recently returned from while the billionaire s'ends Roger a was a little messy in cleaning it off. Meanwhile I was scanning theatriptoCancunwherehehadspentlittle token of his appreciation like Even after all these years, I can be rest of the room for more green an entire day adventuring through a basket offruitor a stateZof-the-art quite naive, paint. I could only imagine where it thertrins ofa Mayan city. No sooner super laptop. I rustled them up and began the hadlanded, had he finished hiS account, ofthe Over the years I have begun interrogation. At the same time, Miraculously, it was nowher'e trip than Roger hadto top thestory to look forward to tales of Roger's ] attempm4to remove the green besides the sink. That fact still sur- with an even more interesting one. many adventures and accomlglish- paint with a washcloth, prises me. We dodged a green but- "One time lwas in a~ Guatema- merits. 1-f ag~6bne builf a house, The boys were incredulous, letthere, lan jungle with an elite team of Roger built a castle. If a hu.nter The staff of the Tri-County News Green paint? Where? They didn't It's been quite a summer. Mycommandos," said Roger casUal!y bagged a~sig:pOil~t.buckTROger shot recognizes that it has a responsi: know about any green paint! boys are young, busy and curious, as he took a puff from his cigar,' 1 one with a rack so big it took two bility to rep@t the news accurate- I showed them the sink. I'm not sure how many more of found an entire lost civilization of deertowalkalongsidethebuckjust ty and fairly, and that it is account- Oh, that green paint! Yes, theiryouthfuladventuresIcanhan- Mayans. They thought I was a god to help support its massive anflers, able to the public. Please contac{ maybe they remembered some- die. Some days I think I can't wait and wanted to sacrifice a maiden Roger always catches the big-our office if you feet we've fallen thing about that. for them to grow up so I can have to me. I convinced them not to, gestfish, dates the prettiest women, short of that objective. The washcloth was completelyan orderly house where the carpet though." eats in the finest restaurants, trav- LETTERS: The Tri-County News , welcomes letters promoting the ex ineffective. The paint was ~ecurely is clean, beds are made, bikes are "Roger, werent you a computer els to the coolest places, knows the . . ! ~_ . " attached to the once-white sink[ not spray-painted and wl~ite sinks repairman in the Army," I asked most famous people allwhilenever chan~e of ideas ann opinions. ~o oe I applied more soap, scrubbed remain white. "Why would you be in a Guatema- seeming to leave his apartment in considered for pubhcaotfTurrt~nttte2 Im not tl .... yet That fact b I Ion jungle ~-ith ..... dos?" hi .... 'S b ...... t. shOU[rd ain~rerSSta" tiPvm~c .......... hard~,. .... d continued question- O~l~ gl 111118 m0rmng wncn fl er [ l{}[efl ll : ,, " "in [ibe[ous'[ t lI1 riow did ?the green paint get I went into the bathroom to clean he now remembered that he had a little loose, but he always makes uucat serf promot o , e into the sink. the sink. My scrubbing hadn't been told me previously of his actual even the dullest social function toerrrSer~e[~erswid.~grt~g ch~ahtdr They looked at each other, then as thorough as I thought. There, on occu ation while in the Arm "Wellmuch more entertainin~ (Editors P P " p , y. . v - All letters must bear the writer's sig- back to me. Then they admitted the left-hand-side, near the upper uh ... I cant actuall tell you what Note. No Rogers were harmed m Y nature, address and telephone num- to using the spray paint. Without corner were three small green dots I was doing there because it was a the making of thin column). . Stearns County Press Assoc. ~~l~lll~ ~ ~ ~ ( 2008 MNAAward for BestAdver- - tisement; 2008 Award for Portrait